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Dec. 31

“Donors have made it clear to me that they weren’t going to contribute because they weren’t happy with the leadership.”

–Florida Republican Party fundraiser Mark Guzzetta of Boca Raton explaining why he joined other top donors to call for the resignation of state party Chairman Jim Greer.
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Dec. 30

“Don’t hold your breath.”

–Paula Dockery responding to a suggestion from Bill McCollum’s campaign that her gubernatorial campaign is drawing to an close. Dockery and McCollum are facing each other in a Republican primary.
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Dec. 29

“This process moves the courts from calling balls and strikes, from creating a level playing field, into the realm of a social service agency, picking sides.”

–Palm Beach County Comptroller & Circuit Court Clerk Sharon Bock on a state supreme court order issued Monday that requires mediation on all homestead properties prior to a foreclosure hearing.

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Dec. 28

“I thought we’d get a lot of junkers, but the cars that came in are really nice.”

–Gerry Vertucci, whose Riviera Beach junk yard has a surplus of auto parts after the federal government’s Cash for Clunkers program.

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Dec. 8
“They were equally painful.”

–U.S. Rep. John Mica, R-Winter Park, comparing the state approval of the SunRail bill to his successful passing of a kidney stone.

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Dec. 7

“Ever since the day that I was able to read the Constitution, I’ve been pro-Second Amendment. And I’m usually the only person in the room that can protect you.”

–Republican Congressional candidate Ed Lynch during a debate last week.
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Nov. 17

“He’s come back with every strange fish there is.”

–Darrin Duchene of Palm Springs, whose son has caught a number of exotic fish, including a jaguar guapote, in a nearby pond. On Tuesday, the Florida Fish & Wildlife Conservation Commission poisoned the pond in hopes of killing piranhas.
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Nov. 12

“I love psychology majors and all these other folks, but when you talk about the science, technology, engineering and math industry, we have to be focused on the type of economy we have. People ask me, ‘What are you doing to produce more math majors in the state of Florida.’”

–Florida Education Commissioner Eric Smith during a rare meeting of the state groups responsible for public education. Of 49,775 bachelor’s degrees Florida awarded in 2008, just 267 were math majors.

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Nov. 3

“The only reason that I am not crying is I took a Xanax.”

–Boca Raton attorney Stuart Rosenfeldt after his law partner, Scott Rothstein, was accused of orchestrating an investment scheme that handed major financial losses to investors.

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Oct. 29

“You’re still getting killed.”

–Vice President Biden on Florida’s economy.

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Oct. 28

“They were leaving because we had not been able to give them a raise in four years.”

–Child Care Association of Brevard County Director Barbara Moore explaining why a progress report for the federal stimulus plan showed she used money to save 129 jobs at her center. The money was used to give all 129 employees a raise.

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Oct. 27

“I didn’t know his itinerary. That’s all.”

–Gov. Charlie Crist answering questions about why he did not attend any events with President Obama in Florida on Monday.
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Oct. 21

“Mr. Masilotti’s discussions with the United States produced no new leads, uncovered no previously unknown schemes, led to zero indictments, zero arrests and not a single new investigation. Instead, his information was filled with half-truths and material omissions.”

–U.S. Attorney Stephen Carlton weighing in on a request for a reduced prison sentence from former Palm Beach County Commissioner Tony Masilotti.

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Oct. 17

“It’s like putting a Band-Aid on an amputated leg.”

–UCF economist Sean Snaith reacting to news from Gov. Crist’s office that stimulus money has saved 22,000 jobs in a state with 11% unemployment for the first time since 1975.

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Oct. 16

“My concern is either they don’t think we have the expertise or they don’t think we have the integrity.”

–Port of Palm Beach Chairman Ed Oppel responding to a request from the state to halt efforts to develop an inland port.

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Oct. 15

“This enables him to take credit for what many might see as an empty gesture but one that might advance his ambitions.”

–Tony Alfieri, director of the Center for Ethics & Public Service at the University of Miami law school, about Gov. Crist’s call for a state corruption grand jury.

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Oct. 14

“Let me say this once: I am not under any investigation. My marriage is intact. My health is good and thank God the health of my family is good.”

–U.S. Rep. Robert Wexler, D-Boca Raton, announcing his plan to resign from Congress.

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Oct. 13

“When in doubt, don’t.”

–Former state Sen. Daniel Webster, a Republican and former House Speaker saying he won’t run against U.S. Rep. Alan Grayson, an Orlando Democrat.

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Oct. 10

“Now give Bill McCollum some credit. He’s done a very good job of making sure he always has a job. But what about jobs for everybody else?”

–Democratic gubernatorial candidate Alex Sink, a relative newcomer in Florida politics, cracking on her likely Republican opponent Bill McCollum, who has been in politics for 29 years.

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Oct. 8

“Once again our leadership skills and our statesmanship will be put to the test with this challenging budget environment.”

–State House budget chief David Rivera, R-Miami, on the $2.6 billion budget hole lawmakers face next year.

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Oct. 5

“The official misconduct charge is hanging by a thread.”

–Indicted former House Speaker Ray Sansom’s attorney, Steven Dobson, after a judged dismissed key parts of the case.

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Sept. 26

“They wanted a change back in 1976. You remember? …. They got one-Jimmy Carter. Four years later, they took care of business-Ronald Reagan. It may happen again.”

–Gov. Charlie Crist predicting a one-term presidency for President Barack Obama.

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Sept. 23

“We have gone from having nothing of substance to something that is more stringent than state law and even the Miami model.”

–Palm Beach County Attorney Denise Nieman about a plan to create an watchdog unit to investigate corruption.

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Sept. 21

“I feel we have scrutinized every item.”

–Palm Beach County Commissioner Jess Santamaria supporting a 14.9 percent the tax rate increase.

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Sept. 18

“We don’t use technology to circumvent the open government laws and we don’t use text messages to discuss state business.”

–Gov. Charlie Crist’s spokeswoman, Erin Isaac, describing the governor’s decision to bar his staff from sending text, PIN and instant messages from their cell phones.

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Sept. 14

“There’s nothing secret about the Sunshine team.”

–Florida Attorney General Bill McCollum answering questions about a new open government initiative.

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Sept. 9

“You lie!”

–U.S. Rep. Joe Wilson, R-S.C., during President Obama’s speech on health care reform.

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Sept. 8

“After reading and hearing of what’s happening over at the Public Service Commission, it sounds to me like they’re ready to implode over there.”

–Sen. Mike Fasano, R-New Port Richey, asking for a Senate ethics investigation into possible ethics violations at the PSC.

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Aug 24

“Such inexcusable conduct undermines the public trust and confidence in the regulatory process and impugns the integrity of this commission.”

–Public Service Commission member Nathan Skop after learning the regulator’s chief lobbyist attended a Kentucky Derby party at the Palm Beach Gardens home of FPL Vice President Ed Tancer. FPL has two cases pending before the PSC worth more than $4 billion.

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Aug 24

“Whoop de do – who’s that hurting? It’s not hurting anyone.”

–Boynton Beach recreational fisherman Robert Bishop insisting he shouldn’t need a $9 fishing license to catch small fish. A new state law this year requires a license for shoreline, saltwater fishing.

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Aug 14

“Dunkin’ Donuts is pleased that the signs have been removed.”

– A company spokeswoman after the state fired Bay County Heath Department Director Mike Thomas for posting a sign reading “America Dies on Dunkin” as part of his campaign against obesity.

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Aug 13

“Maybe by divine justice it came out to a tie.”

–Palm Beach County GOP Chairman Sid Dinerstein on a failed bid to censure Gov. Charlie Crist.

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Aug 11

“We’re getting back zippo.”

–Palm Beach Councilman William Diamond recommending the town secede from Palm Beach County.
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Aug. 6

“To walk away without a compelling reason is disrespectful to the party and the people you took an oath to represent.”

–Former Republican Party of Florida Director David Johnson on U.S. Sen. Mel Martinez’s resignation.

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Aug. 6

“I don’t think so.”

–Gov. Charlie Crist
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Aug. 5

“Chris Craft is a job-killing army of one.”

–The opening salvo from National Republican Congressional Committee spokesman Andy Seré after Craft, a St. Lucie County Democrat, announced his campaign to unseat U.S. Rep. Tom Rooney, R-Tequesta.

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Aug. 2

“If the editor saw me walking across Sarasota Bay on top of the water, the next day the headline would say: ‘Bennett can’t swim.”

–State Sen. Mike Bennett, R-Bradenton, after being questioned about using taxpayer money to charter planes to commute to the Capital.

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July 31

“‘Cash for clunkers’ is an apt description of the kind of government Americans are getting in return for their tax dollars these days.”

–Former Jeb Bush speechwriter Albert Martinez via Twitter.
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July 24

“Hey, nobody thought Utah was going to beat Alabama in the Sugar Bowl, right? But it happened.”

–Designated House Democratic Leader Ron Saunders on his party’s chances of taking control of the chamber in 2010 for the first time in 14 years.

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July 14

“This is the big banana.”

–Attorney General Bill McCollum about a $2.3 million price gouging settlement announced Monday.

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July 3

“Every March, when Tallahassee comes to life, no one’s safe.”

–St. Lucie County Clerk of Courts Joe Smith about changes state lawmakers made this year in the way courts are funded.

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July 1
SMOKE ‘EM IF YOU CAN AFFORD ‘EM

–News Service Florida headline about the state tax on cigarettes increase by $1 today.
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June 24
“495 days until Election Day 2010!”

–GOP gubernatorial candidate Bill McCollum via Twitter.
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June 23

“Since the legislature is building airport hangars instead of funding FDLE, they’re a little behind.”

–Leon County State Attorney Willie Meggs after being asked when a forensic exam of indicted former House Speaker Ray Sansom would be completed.
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June 17

“Florida received an F-, the lowest overall grade in our survey.”

–The Heartland Institute’s Property and Casualty Insurance 2009 Report Card.

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June 14

“Hopped up out of bed, turned my swag on….”

–State Rep. Alan Williams, D-Tallahassee, sending Soulja Boy lyrics out to his Twitter followers.

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June 10

“I don’t understand it. … He’s unassailable.”

–Sean Snaith of the UCF Institute for Economic Competitiveness on how Gov. Crist has maintained high approval ratings despite the state’s economic woes.

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June 4

“I guess she’s not going to be able to do it.”

– Norman Ostrau, director of FAU’s Public Ethics Academy, on former Palm Beach County Commissioner Mary McCarty’s scheduled June 17 speech on how not to behave in office.

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May 29

“Pythons are not Republican or Democrat and neither is water.”

– SFWMD Chairman Eric Buermann after touring the Everglades.

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May 24

“He’s always liked boxers, the wilder the better. But we’d never seen him wear pink before.”

– Sheree Boyd, whose son, Zachery, was pictured in pink “I Love NY” boxers during a firefight with the Taliban.

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May 22

“It’s been a remarkable job.”

–Palm Beach County stripper registrar Barbara Wilmoth.

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May 21

“In our business we pride ourselves on telling the truth.”

–Sen. Mike Bennett, R-Bradenton, explaining that Florida Insurance Commissioner Kevin McCarty should be fired for allegedly misleading him about an insurance bill.
___________________________________________________

May 20

“Did you guys see my house? I’m trying to figure out if my lawn is getting mowed there.”

–President Obama during a phone call with the space shuttle Atlantis crew.

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May 19

“On the road again today with my campaign aides Mr. Garmin and Mr. Sunpass.”

–U.S. Senate candidate Marco Rubio via Twitter.

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May 18

“We’re going to win!”

–Republican Bill McCollum announcing his campaign for governor.

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May 15

“That’s all disgusting stuff, man…. I’m not into that kind of politics at all. I don’t want to even talk about it. I don’t want to hear about it. I don’t want anything to do with that stuff.”

–GOP U.S. Senate candidate Marco Rubio responding to a question about Outrage, a documentary that implies his Republican primary opponent, Gov. Charlie Crist, is gay.

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May 13

“In unique and challenging times like these, our state needs a new and different kind of leadership.”

–Democrat Alex Sink announcing her campaign for governor.

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April 22

“Do it for the children.”

–Republican Gov. Charlie Crist urging lawmakers to take $1.1 billion from the Seminole Indians of Florida for allowing blackjack, roulette and craps in their casinos.

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April 20

“My particular newspaper has called on me to make sure that I vote to do away with special-interest, state-delivered welfare to corporations. And I am going to do that.”

–Rep. Ritch Workman, R-Melbourne, before voting to remove a sales tax exemption for newspapers and magazines delivered by mail.

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April 17

“Do you want a haircut or do you want an amputation? That is your choice.”

–Rep. Alan Hayes, R-Umatilla, on House Democrats’ objections to nearly $1 billion in new fees to cover budget holes.

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April 15

“They send these kids to Iraq to fly jets, they ought to be able to play blackjack.”

–State Sen. Dennis Jones, R-Treasure Island, on why he opposes a proposal to increase the gambling age in Florida from 18 to 21.

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April 14

“My car is actually parked right outside the door. So could you let me know what time you’re leaving?”

–Democratic Rep. Audrey Gibson, a Nissan Altima owner, responding to Rep. Adam Hasner, R-Boca Raton. Hasner said said he wanted lawmakers to approve a constitutional amendment for the 2010 ballot more than a 18 months before Election Day because he “might get hit by a car” leaving the Capitol.

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April 13

“I’m not going to congratulate you on bringing forth this bill. However, I am going to congratulate you on all the shots you’ve taken as you’ve brought forth this bill.”

–State Rep. Darryl Rouson, D-St. Petersburg, before voting against a bill from Rep. Ellyn Bogdanoff to increase oversight on county clerk of court budgets.

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April 12

“Tell me about it!”

–U.S. Rep. Robert Wexler, D-Boca Raton, responding to a Boyton Beach woman who told him that she couldn’t “live with my parents in their 55-and-older community forever.”

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March 31

“Smoke ‘em, chew ‘em, dip ‘em or whatever. We have to tax ‘em. Doesn’t matter if its … smuggled in from Castro. They need to be taxed.”

–Senate Health & Human Services Appropriations Chairman Durell Peaden, R-Crestview, in explaining his support for a $1 tax increase on cigarettes and other tobacco.

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March 27

“Wiggling, who knows? Wiggle, wiggle. I’m wiggling right now.”

–House Speaker Larry Cretul, R-Ocala, on whether there was “wiggle room” in his chamber’s opposition to new card games at Seminole casinos.

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March 25

“We’re hoping and praying that the money will be there.”

–Senate Pre-K-12 Appropriations Committee Chairman Stephen Wise, R-Jacksonville, about the chamber’s proposed education budget.

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March 24

“Veterans have a right to run for office without being termed out. So I think we have some credence here.”

–Senate Community Affairs Committee Vice Chairman Gary Siplin, D-Orlando, before voting for a constitutional amendment that would ask voter to extend property tax breaks for disabled veterans and extend term limits.

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March 20

“We threw that away.”

–Senate Transportation & Economic Development Appropriations Chairman Mike Fasano, R-New Port Richey, on Gov. Charlie Crist’s budget recommendations.

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March 19

“This is the slowest session beginning I have ever seen in my life.”

–Vern Pickup-Crawford, who has four decades of experience lobbying in the state Capitol, to the Palm Beach County delegation.

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March 12

“Don’t piss on me and tell me it’s raining.”

–Sen. Chris Smith, D-Fort Lauderdale, in a heated exchange about President Obama during a Senate Transportation and Economic Development meeting.

Tags: Alan Hays, Alex Sink, Audrey Gibson, Charlie Crist, Chris Smith, Darryl Rouson, Dennis Jones, Durell Peaden, Gary Siplin, Joe Wilson, Larry Cretul, Mark Guzzetta, Mike Fasano, Mike Thomas, Nathan Skop, Paula Dockery, Ritch Workman, Robert Wexler, Stephen Wise

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